#blessed

I'm fairly certain I'm the poster-child for forgetting how blessed we are. Thankfully, Sunday comes around every week and I've made it a personal goal of mine to really ponder my life every Sunday night and think of ways I can improve my life, reminisce on the good things that happened in the past week, make a mental note of how to better things I may have messed up on and I always end these personal thought-sessions with myself by thinking of and writing down a bunch of my blessings. It. Is. So. Cool. And best of all? Its helped me focus throughout the week on my blessings rather than my "tragedies." 

I swear I've got to be the most blessed person on planet earth. I don't know how or why so many good things can happen to one person, especially me! But you won't find me complaining. Its an incredible life I live. Especially lately. Its amazing to me how much ones life can change from one year to the next. A year ago, I was in an icky place and I was NOT happy. My life was so crummy at that point, it felt nearly impossible to even try and focus on my blessings (i'm sure if i would have changed my woe-is-me attitude i could have found the light, but unfortunately, i didn't..but thats another story) it was just a bummy time of life. But this year, this year is so different and SO dang good! I finally have a few GREAT people in my life who I trust 100% completely and they're supportive, uplifting, happy, optimistic people who really help in making my life the best life ever, despite the trials I still face from time to time. Now if thats not a blessing, then I don't know what is! 

As I said, I like to reminisce on the past week... Tonight (blasted insomnia) I've decided to share my reminiscing/blessings with you. You lucky people ;) I find that my greatest blessings are usually people and experiences, not objects..

I couldn't talk about my blessings without mentioning my lovely little sisters. Savannah Klaire and Miss Adi are the most phenomenal little ladies the world will ever know. I love these girls so much and I'm so, so, soooo thankful for their examples in my life and for how happy they always make me. Seriously, though, these girls are as close as they come to perfect and if you've met my sisters, before, you know what I mean.

 Somehow my family (minus mom..and kind of me) have decided to become shooters. Gunmen? I don't even know what its called... We've decided to take up shooting guns. (does that one make sense?) Maybe I'd like it more if I could aim at all - but I can't. I don't think the fact that I can't wink helps much, either. However, its been a lot of fun to shoot cans in our backyard with BB guns with the girls and Craig. Bonding time is too good for words, you know?

we're setting up cans - not gardening

 Another blessing I'd be silly to ignore is my handsome boyfriend. Man, I love that Craig. There is something magical (don't make fun of my cheesiness, now) about having your boyfriend/best friend be a person you can be totally open with and know there will be no judgement and no ridicule, only care, support and a smile on his darling face. It is the best feeling in the world to be respected and treated how a girl (or anyone, for that matter) should be treated! Unfortunately that is a luxury I've not experienced fully before I knew Craig. I am so beyond happy with him and I get butterflies in my tummy just thinking of him and hearing his name. He's perfect, I tell you. I really am dating the most phenomenal, uplifting, supportive, funny, sweet, attractive, charismatic, caring, concerned, respectful, gentlemanly man. I'm so thankful for his kind words and the faith he has in me and the way he can make me feel like the prettiest girl!

Craig, you are one heck of a guy! :) :) :)

There is also my perfect parents (sadly, i didn't' photograph those cuties, this week) who are the best of the best. I'm in awe of the luck I have when it comes to a mommy and daddy who love each other and have built a happy, funny home and family. I'm so thankful for their support and motivation, daily. Like my sisters, if you know my parents, you know exactly what I'm talking about. They're uh-maze-ing! 

I hope this week you can all take a minute, a minute is all it takes, to ponder your blessings, I can promise you that if you do this you will feel your attitude change and you will have a much better, brighter week. And who doesn't want that??

Love you all!

funday

Sundays are the best. 

I had Ward Conference today where I was able to hear several incredibly amazing talks that made me happy, gave me goosebumps and gave me so much to look forward to and work for. It was everything I needed to hear. All while I was sitting in between my boyfriend and best friend. It was one of those moments where I was thinking...how can life get better than this? 

That is all.

craig & i at church

...& the day was even better because we got a new cute photograph...

Real Talk, Real Study

I've been wanting to do a new post for a while, now, but I just haven't been able to think of anything worth posting about. To be honest, I still have no idea what I should talk about but I figured I might as well start typing and see where that leads me. We'll see if I even finish this post and publish it, its very possible I'll just delete it then get back to my day.


Wait, I've got it.

If you remember from a previous post, one of my new years resolutions was to read the scriptures daily, and also make my scripture study more meaningful. Guess what? I've read them every day this year, so far. I've always been pretty good at reading, daily, but I've noticed a lot of times my "study" would consist of reading a few verses then going about my day, wishing I could apply what I read about in my life, but never taking any action in making that wish a reality.

So that is what I've been working hard on this year of twenty-twelve.

And its been life-changing.

I've always had a testimony of the Book of Mormon, even when I was very young, thanks to my daddy and his strong testimony of the Book of Mormon that I was able to sort of lean on for several years. As I got older I began developing a more personal, independent testimony. For a while, though, my testimony dealing with the Book of Mormon was very stationary, never really getting bigger or more powerful, mostly just standing still...up until January 1st, 2012. 

I was in the middle of the Book of Mormon at the end of 2011, but like I said, my personal study wasn't that deep or meaningful, so I made the decision to start over and do everything in my power to make it more spiritual, powerful and deep. I also went into this new study habit with the attitude of dedicating some major time to studying this great book. I've had to change my thought process. If I have time to do homework, play with my family, be with Craig, exercise, take naps, etc, then there is no reason I don't also have time to spend in my scriptures. I totally have that time. No excuses. Even if it is two in the morning and all I want to do is snuggle up in my bed and sleep, I now hold myself to a higher standard knowing that I have to study my scriptures, even if its just a verse or two. I have vowed to always say a prayer before I read and really focus on what it is I'm reading, even if I'm crunched on time. It doesn't seem like you're really reading your scriptures if, by the end of your "study" you can't even say what you read about, you know? And I don't want to do that kind of "studying," anymore. I want the good stuff. The thing is, you can learn a lot from just one verse and I want to learn something from every verse. There's a reason those verses made it into the scriptures and its up to me to figure out why that verse and those words are relevant in my life.  

And there you have it. My post I've been wanting to do for a while, now. 

I knew I could come up with something if I just started...and I'd say the topic of The Book of Mormon is a pretty good one, yeah? 

Until next time, my friends..

"Be Thou an Example of the Believers.."

I had the coolest experience happen to me today. 

I get my e-mail on my phone and usually when it comes through and I hear its specific little 'ding' I ignore it until a later time. Today was no exception, but when I did look at it, I found an e-mail from an address I wasn't familiar with. Normally, I'd immediately delete them but from my phone, I could see a small part of the e-mail that struck my interest...so, I decided to open this mysterious e-mail and boy am I glad that I did.

It was an e-mail from a girl from Pennsylvania who has been reading my blog for some time, now...actually, here's a better idea...I'm going to go ahead and copy and paste this e-mail to the blog so you can read it! {she gave me permission, so its okay!}

Dear Chelsea,
My name is Catherine and I am a 28 year old woman from Pennsylvania which I know is far from Utah but I much like you have difficulties falling asleep at night so sometimes to try and "wear myself out" I will look at blogs and hit the "next blog" button. Several months ago I came across your blog in this way and was pulled into it quickly. I enjoy the way you write and your sense of humor, you seem like your a very fun girl with a great personality. I found myself late one night reading many posts in your blog way back even to 2009. You have a great life! The whole time I read your posts I kept thinking that you have this special light in your life and I couldn't put my finger on why I thought that. Several times I almost e-mailed you in hoping to ask you about your life and possibly discover why you seem so well rounded and bright. Then I came across a post you did where you talked in great detail about being a member of the Mormon church or as you taught me, it is called the LDS church. I felt very happy when I read about your religion so I clicked on your tag called "LDS" and then read all of your posts on your church. I was overwhelmed with this feeling that I wanted to have that cool religion in my life to. I read your posts on your general conference where the prophets of your church spoke and I visited the link you had to the church website and learned a little bit about your book of Mormon which seems to be a lot like the Holy Bible but with more to do with the LDS faith. I decided to order one and recieved it only a few days ago and finally started reading it. I am in the book called 1 Nephi only a couple chapters in but I am enjoying learning about Nephi and Lehi and his brothers. When I read about your blog I read about your ex boyfriend who was a missionary for your church and when I looked at your church website i learned more about missionaries so I decided to contact missionaries through the Mormon website. They are coming to my apartment later this week. I just wanted to show my appreciation to you for being so open and faithful about your church because I believe it is about to change my life and I doubt I would have been interested in it if it weren't for you blog and the passion you have about your faith. Thank you for being a example to me in a time when i needed one most. Please tell this story and I will hope that people will learn from it and see they can learn about your church to.
God be with you,
Catherine


How neat is that???? Who knew I could do Missionary work through my blog?! I am so glad that this sweet lady found my blog and is reading The Book of Mormon and meeting with the Missionaries! I know it will bless her life (:
This whole experience has just really reminded me to always be an example of the Church of Jesus Christ of Later-Day Saints because you never know who is watching (or reading) your actions and examples!

With this in mind, I looked up the General Conference talk about being an example, read it, and loved it even more than I did the first time. Feel free to read it, here.

I Belong to the Church..

Today I am thankful for the gospel. I am thankful to be born and raised a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Later-Day Saints. I am grateful that I know the truth of this gospel and that I have a friendship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I am thankful for the opportunity to go to church each week and to have the continual motivation to better myself because of it. I am grateful for the scriptures and the lessons they've taught me and comfort they've given me. I'm thankful for the power of prayer and the chance it gives me to talk to my Father in Heaven. I'm thankful for the Plan of Salvation and the fact that I can live with my family forever, even after we die. I'm thankful for the Atonement and that I can be forgiven of my many sins. I'm thankful for the happiness and peace the gospel brings me in my life (: 

If you'd like to learn more about The Church of Jesus Christ of Later-Day Saints, click here.

Mr. Brandon Flowers {is hott}

Brandon Flowers is the lead singer for the band, The Killers, and he is a Mormon.

This is awesome. Go ahead and watch.

Your Happily Ever After

Once Upon A Time...

I just finished reading the BEST book! 

While watching General Conference last week, I chose to watch the shows in between the sessions. That meant that I also watched the commercials. I am convinced there were only six commercials, total, but there was one that stuck out to me each time it aired. It was the commercial about Dieter F. Uchtdorf's book, "Your Happily Ever After." 

Maybe I was drawn to this book because I've always been a sucker for fairy-tales or maybe it was because President Uchtdorf has always been my favorite since he was made a member of the Quorum of the Twelve. I don't know what it was but I'm so grateful that I got that continual urge to get my hands on that book.

My cute mommy (i wuv yoo) bought it for me this afternoon and I sat down with it a few minutes, ago...and its already completed. It isn't a long book or a difficult read, at all and obviously it doesn't take much of your time so guess what I'm going to do? I am going to recommend that YOU READ IT! Really, do. Go take a visit to lovely Deseret Book and purchase this lovely thing. I think it was only $15? Not positive, but I can tell you that its so good and worth that money. It should be $100! (haha okay that was cheesey) Mm, so good.

It is a book directed towards young girls, single girls, girls experiencing difficult times or in the process of overcoming trials. President Uchtdorf compares us princesses to Cinderella, Belle and the millers daughter, in that we, much like those princesses, have to endure trials and overcome hardships before we can reach our own happily ever after. He also says that our Once Upon A Time is now and one day we will look back at our journey and be able to see that we are living happily ever after. 

I want to go on, but its a short book and I don't want to tell you everything so you'll find an excuse not to read it. So, as I said before, GO BUY IT and read it and love it. 

This book filled my heart full of hope and reinforced my faith and trust in Heavenly Father's plan for me and especially in His timing! 

Okay, I'm done...Happy reading!! (:

Part 2

It just didn't feel right...

Posting about Saturday's General Conference and not Sundays. 

Didya watch it? Did you love it? 

I did. I did.

Favorite talks, ready go!

[morning session]

Robert D. Hales: He spoke about patience and submitting ourselves to the Lords will. He spoke a lot about having faith and trusting in the Lord's timing and His plan, too. I was able to really apply this one to my life because I swear I'm just about the most impatient person on earth and so frequently I get caught up in wanting what I want, when I want it. It was great to be reminded that its all going to happen in God's time and its going to work better that way and make me happier, as well! 

Elaine S. Dalton: She spoke a lot about dads and their examples and important role in their daughters lives. Mostly, I just loved this one because I've got my wonderful daddy who is the father to three girls and I think he does his daddy-jobs, perfectly. It made me smile. She explained what a good dad should be, traits he should have, things he should do, etc. and my daddy was everything she described. This talk made me even more thankful for the fabulous daddy Savannah, Adi and I have been blessed with.

M. Russell Ballard: His talk was about taking the name of Christ upon us and taking that seriously. The most important thing in this talk, to me was when he stressed the name of our church. It is called The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and should be referred to that more often that being referred to as LDS, Mormon, Christian, and the other nicknames our church has.

President Thomas S. Monson: To me, it seemed our Prophet stressed the importance of prayer. I was so happy to hear him speak so sincerely and passionately about how important it is to talk to our Father in Heaven, daily, and to keep a strong, unbreakable relationship with Him.

[afternoon session]

J. Devn Cornish: This talk, too, was about praying and having faith in our own prayers. What specifically stuck out to me is when he said when we ask for something, we need to have faith we will receive it. Also, we need to pray sincerely and realize how special it is to pray.

..I am so thankful for General Conference. I learned so much and heard so many great things and have set several new goals for myself to work towards (: The gospel is amazing and I'm SO happy that I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! 

**************

On a side note, the day before General Conference, I finished the Book of Mormon! I think this was my fourth time finishing! I love reading the Book of Mormon because each time you read it, you learn something new, get new feelings and the spirit is never dull just because you've already read it.

I love the scriptures!

I've got a question, now... I'm still deciding if I'm going to read the Book of Mormon, again, or shift my focus to Doctrine and Covenants or the New Testament, but either way, do any of you have any study habits that have worked very well for you? This time around I'm interested in changing my study habits to see if I can learn more new things! 

#ldsconf

Did you watch General Conference, today? I did. Oh golly, I love General Conference. There is absolutely nothing better than hearing the council from the Prophet, the 12 Apostles and the rest of the church leaders. They are truly inspired men called of God.

My view from the floor watching the Saturday Afternoon Session 

Did you hear the news? Provo is getting a second temple!! Two temples in Provo! That news made my heart skip a beat or two. I can't wait to visit it...and stalk it while its being built! (:

Okay, so what was your favorite talk? I know there are still two sessions tomorrow {and Priesthood tonight for you lucky men} but you can have a favorite talk of the day, you know? I think I had three favorite talks, today, all in the afternoon session.

1) Ian S. Ardern. He talked about using our time wisely and prioritizing and making sure we use our time to serve God and prepare to meet God, one day. He specifically hit on technology distracting us from using our time wisely. I am guilty of this. I'm an avid Facebooker, blog-stalker, tweeter... Definitely something I'll have to work on. I'm thankful to have heard this talk. (& i loved his accent)

2) LeGrand R. Curtis Jr. He talked about the Plan of Redemption. I just love that we're all fortunate enough to be able to repent of our wrong doings and still make it back to live with Heavenly Father, someday, if we live a righteous life. We're far luckier than we deserve, you know?

3) D. Todd Christofferson. This one is probably my very favorite talk...so far. He, too, talked about repentance. Something that really stuck out to me is when he said there has to be effort behind repentance instead of just thinking of repentance in your mind, you need to actively change. Love it. He also talked about the 5 aspects of repentance. 1: The invitation to repent. 2: Striving to change. 3: Abandon sin/commit to obedience. 4: Willingness to persevere (sp?). 5: Whatever the cost of forgiveness, it is swallowed up by the joy of being forgiven. So amazing.

Taking notes (:

I feel like I smiled all through these two amazing sessions... I can't wait for tomorrow's sessions! (: I hope you all get the chance to listen to/watch/read the talks, too! They're truly inspired and will, without a doubt, help you in your life if you take the council with an open heart!

Yes, I still play Conference Bingo. No, you're never too old to do so.

the P word

Patience.

Ah, the very word makes me cringe. You know how everyone has that one trial they have to battle their whole lives, or for a large portion of it? Mine is patience. Stinkin', evil, stressful patience. (As you can see, I've still got a long way to go before I conquer this one.)


Well, last night while I was laying in bed and trying to fall asleep, I was reading General Conference talks and came across one entitled, "Continue in Patience" that was given by the amazing, Dieter F. Uchtdorf. I knew I had to read this one, and so I did. There was a section in his talk that particularly stuck out to me:

"Waiting can be hard. Children know it, and so do adults. We live in a world offering fast food, instant messaging, on-demand movies, and immediate answers to the most trivial or profound questions. We don’t like to wait. Some even feel their blood pressure rise when their line at the grocery store moves slower than those around them.

Patience—the ability to put our desires on hold for a time—is a precious and rare virtue. We want what we want, and we want it now. Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter.

Nevertheless, without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect. Indeed, patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace.

As parents, we know how unwise it would be to indulge our children’s every desire. But children are not the only ones who spoil when showered with immediate gratification. Our Heavenly Father knows what good parents come to understand over time: if children are ever going to mature and reach their potential, they must learn to wait."

I'm so glad I came across this talk, more specifically, this section of this great talk.. President Uchtdorf says it perfectly, waiting is hard..but worth it! I hope one day (soon) I can finally grasp this concept or at least get better at enduring patience in a positive way! :)

Have a good day, my loves!

Gratitude

{a school assignment...my teacher is all about getting her students outside of their comfort zone. this is usually a challenge i don't participate in, but i was feeling gutsy today. so, here it is. if you care to read, enjoy.}

I, Chelsea Kate Walker, am so, so very fortunate. Today, as I sat in my car in the school parking lot, a man, probably a few years older than me walked by. I quickly noticed he was well dressed, then I noticed he had an awful limp. Upon closer examination, I saw this man had a lot of physical damage done to all parts of his body I could see. It looked to me as if he'd been a burn-victim. As soon as I saw this, my thoughts immediately turned to gratitude for how fortunate I am. I admire than man. I can't imagine what he's been through and I can't imagine how fortunate he must feel, he survived a tragedy, can walk, go to school, support himself, etc. We are blessed people.
Usually, actually, always, when I think of, or feel gratitude, I think of my kind and gracious, Heavenly Father. Yes, the Lord gives us trials, disabilities and insecurities, but time has taught me He does this not out of anger or cruelty, but out of indescribable, undying LOVE. Whenever I'm faced with a new trial, or I see someone else go through a trial, I like to think of it as a compliment from God. He doesn't give us, His children, trials we can't handle or overcome. That, to me, means Heavenly Father knows how strong we truly are and when He gives us these trials, He is giving us, too, the opportunity to get a glimpse of our strength.
Perhaps the best part of these hardships is that we never ever have to face them, alone. NO matter what the issue is, we can get on our knees and seek help from the Lord. He will never forsake us. He hears prayers. He is the Almighty and will never leave us feeling comfortless or alone.
I'm so grateful I was able to see that man who inspired me to dig deeper into my gratitude and further recognize God's love for His children. I am thankful that his presence reminded me that, yes, hard times are inevitable, but there is always a way to make the best of a bad situation and grow and learn from it, and become a stronger person by doing so.
Life is a gift and a test and I'm grateful, from the bottom of my heart, that I've been given the opportunity to live on earth and learn and grow stronger from the experiences my Heavenly Father has given me, graciously.

Thankful Day 2

CHURCH.

I am so, so very thankful for church and for the opportunity I have each week to take the Sacrament, feel the spirit, see friends, listen to incredible lessons and learn more about the gospel.

Its a short and simple 'thankful' of mine, but I think its one of the most important. :)

twenty-eleven

2011.

Is it really only May? Goodness, I tell you what, 2011 has been the longest year of my life and I'm not even half way through it! Sheesh. I think it would be safe to say that my life has been a 24/7 chaotic whirlwind since mid-January to this very day and truly, the chaos isn't showing any sings of stopping anytime soon. ::deep, cleansing breathe:: In these five months, my limits have been tried time after time, my faith has been challenged, my standards have been tested and my mental state has been abused on thousands of occasions. 

I'll admit, several times a week I'll throw a full-blown pity party for myself. Its a party of one (me) in my room including lots of kleenex, a blankie and lots of emotion. Sounds fun, huh? (The answer, by the way, is no. H, no.) All year I have been so completely overwhelmed with my future. I'm terrified, excited, anxious, curious and most of all, stressed out about what is to come of it. Really, I don't know why I struggle so much with being content and focused on my "now," but it is a serious problem of mine. I'm always looking ahead or looking back and never giving much attention to where I'm currently at. Ah, yes, its really something I need to work on because as hard as it is to believe, I hear one day I'll actually miss these days. 

Today I had the great opportunity to spend some time with some of my closest friends and as usual, we covered nearly 10,000 topics. One topic that really was interesting to me is when my dear and lovely friends Cassie and Chelsea were talking about how sometimes they'll get really caught up in their struggles and be discouraged with their lives and just not be happy at all. We all have those days, you know? Then, they said they always feel so bad about doing so because they'll hear about someone else who has it so much worse and is going through something so much harder and they feel very sorry for them and want to do something kind for them.

It just left me thinking... Its true, someone always has it worse. 

Then my thoughts began to continue as I thought of all the times I've been taught that when you are discouraged, a great way to cheer yourself up is to serve someone else. Then there was the thought that I tell myself, daily, Heavenly Father will never, never, ever put me through a trial that I can't handle and overcome. Between these thoughts, I think I learned a lot tonight and even had some prayers answered as to how I can become more happy and content with my life and my "now." I am so thankful that God answers prayers in such clever ways, such as prompting your friends to say something that leads you into a deep thought process that ends up teaching you a lot about what you need to do with yourself.

With this in mind, 2011 doesn't scare me as much as it did earlier, today, and throughout the year, so far. I understand that in the days to come I may falter and really struggle with things, again, but I hope that I can always remember what I learned and reminded myself tonight and find some peace, again. I hope that I can remind myself that Heavenly Father has the grand plan and understands everything and that He is putting me through this long trial for a very, very good reason that is going to somehow make my life a million times more beautiful than it would have been if I had not experienced it. Life is hard, but I think thats what makes it worth it. We're all on earth to be tested, after all...and some tests aren't easy! :] 

So, 2011? BRING IT!

"It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don't worry. I say that to myself every morning. It all works out in the end. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. He will not forsake us. If we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers." 
— Gordon B. Hinckley

i love when you stumble upon something you know was meant for you to read...

"It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don't worry. I say that to myself every morning. It all works out in the end. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. He will not forsake us. If we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers." 
— Gordon B. Hinckley

i simply remember my favorite things and then i don't feel so bad

Today I did more learning. 

Actually, I've known all these things all along, but today {and throughout these past few weeks) I've been reminded that I am surrounded by the most incredible people on this little earth we live on. Why am I so lucky? I don't know, but the fact remains...I am.

I have the worlds most supportive and loving family. {daddy, mommy, savannah, adi}I'm convinced each of them would drop anything for me and for my happiness. Every day all four of them find a way to show me how much they love me and care for me. Its incredible how fabulous they are. All a person needs is their families love to have a good day. I've learned this, lately. The days I've shut myself in my room are much worse than when I go talk to my parents or play with my beautiful sisters. Simply, I love them with all my heart.

I have the two most amazing aunts. (meredith, julie) As I've stated in my previous post, I'm going through a really hard time, but these two have given me so much advice, support and love. Best of all, they've listened to me complain and vent out my feelings no matter how psycho they are and they tell me its okay. I love them so much, I'm so grateful that as I've got older we've been able to bond so much more and I've been able to hear the stories of their pasts and learn from them. They are such great examples to me. They're amazing and I'm so thankful I'm lucky enough to be their niece.

I have grandparents who are so caring and selfless. (grandma & grandpa walker, grandma & grandpa brown) No matter what, my whole life, my grandparents have been there for me. They've always shown their extreme love and care for me and remind me always that they are there for me. The best things they've done for me are boost my self-esteem. There's just nothing better than a grandparent telling you what a strong, great girl you are.

I have the best friends ever, ever, EVER. (whitney, chelsea, cassie, sarah, kourtney, jenna, kelsie, amy & more) These girls have kept me sane. They only want the best for me and are helping me fight to get it even when I don't feel like fighting. Whenever I need to talk it out, dance it out, sing it out, cry it out, ride it out, eat it out, etc. they are up and ready for it and it always works. These girls were put in my life for a reason, no doubt about it. Love you ladies.

Last and certainly not least, I have Heavenly Father. You know that phrase, "I'd be dead without him/her/them." ? Maybe that isn't really true about everyone, but for me, it is 100% true when it comes to Him. There is nothing more amazing to me than the fact that He is always there to listen to me and help me and show me how much He loves me. That right there is reason enough to never be sad again, I just wish I always saw it that way!


The main lesson I learned today as I was driving home from my beautiful friends home, was this: I've been dwelling so much on the negative and severely neglecting the positive. The positive being the extraordinary people I've listed above, of course. Yep, life is a pain in the bum right now and its harder than hard, but with these people around, it can be a heck of a lot better. They're here for me no matter what. I just need to remember that, better, and for sure I'll be back to normal (probably even better) in no time.

Thanks everyone, I LOVE YOU.


{ps i'm sorry for all the sappy heart-felt posts, lately. i'm just one of those people who write things out to help heal myself...}

some rambles in my head

Its just a well-known fact, we all go through trials throughout our whole lives. I would by lying if I didn't say the last little bit of my life has been the biggest trial I've experienced thus far in my twenty years of life. My apologies, but I'm not going to say what my trial is. (Actually, there are several trials I'm in at the moment...) Its crazy though, I have learned so much during this traumatic situation I find myself in. The most significant thing I have learned, without a doubt, is that Heavenly Father's plan is bigger than me and it isn't MY way, but HIS way. Always. Although I'm still in the process of learning how to live this new way, already I am seeing that this, what's happening, is good. I'm honestly not even sure why, but I can feel that its good when I allow myself to calm down and strive to see His point of view.

Often times, especially lately, I say/tell people I wish I had a crystal ball so I could peer into it and see how my future was going to turn out so I could live my life accordingly. I regret saying that, now, I think. Don't get me wrong, I would adore the chance to learn all about future-ChelseaKate, but I've realized I actually like being clueless, confused and overwhelmed. Let me rephrase that, I actually really despise feeling this way BUT I know because of these feelings and this trial I'm going through, in the future I'm going to look back at this small moment in time and realize that it has shaped me, significantly, because I know this will. One day I'll look back at what I'm going through, now, and smile and be (hopefully) proud of myself for enduring it with a whole bunch of faith, hope and trust. Really, that is what I've been striving to do. I've been on my knees more this past week than I have in a long time, I've read the scriptures with so much more passion and interest than I ever have and I've been able to see that I am a strong girl when I put myself in the Lord's hands and live the way He wants me to. It has really reminded me that all things are possible through God. The best thing its reminded me is that I will never be put through something I can't handle. I'm not going to lie, more often than I'd like to admit, I feel like falling over dead and quitting on this journey, but I know I'd be denying myself on everything life has to offer me.

As for this lovely (haha) thing I'm going through, it hurts worse than any pain mental, physical, emotional I've ever been in, but I know with all of my heart, without a shadow of a doubt, its going to work out perfectly. Just how it should be. Maybe it will be the way I want it to, truly, I feel like it will. But you know, maybe it won't. But one thing is for sure...it's going to work out the way that, in the end, will make me the happiest.

"It is good to have an end to journey toward, but it is the journey that matters in the end."

templars

As if going to the temple wasn't already the best experience ever, try going with your little sister. It makes a significant difference you never knew could happen. Dead serious.

Two weeks ago, Savannah turned the magical #12 and therefore, is now able to go inside of the temple. I've been waiting for her to turn twelve for years, now, for this exact reason. I've always wanted a reliable temple buddy, and now I have one. The cutest, sweetest one. I win when it comes to the game of lucky.

Since Savannah has been able to, we've gone every Wednesday. All two of them. But it is a tradition we will definitely keep up with, no doubt about it. There is something about the temple that just makes you want to go there again and again and again. Savannah and I are both really feeling it.

I'm so lucky. So lucky. 

• Savannah can go to the temple with me
• There is a temple only 15 minutes away from my front porch
• I'm LDS

So lucky - what did I tell you?! 

It is possible this is one of the most unattractive photographs of me, yes, but here we are leaving the temple. {I really tried to get the actual temple in the background behind us, but the sun was bright, I'm bad at self-portraits, and we had to hurry Savannah back home for Young Women.}